I dont have time to blog, but need to get this off my chest

I'm feeling behind in life. There is so much to do, and I'm not even working a consistent job (that's another story). I'm not very good at prioritizing my "mom" and "wife" jobs.

So, what brings me to this blog tonight, is: DINNER.

What's for dinner?????? ugh. The dreaded words. I DON'T KNOW! I should.

I've had this road block now since Eli was born (or so it seems, i've had some great periods of organization, but this is not the norm).

I've pulled my thoughts together many times, but then my calendar of meals really doesn't work. So I guess i need to schedule in FLEXIBILITY. Things that contribute to the ROADBLOCK: time, money, diet, and kid's dislikes.

I've been trying to "get it together" now for weeks. I thought once school started I would get this together, but alas, I have not taken the time to sit down and plan.

We're having spaghetti tonight. I have one REALLY happy kid, but one equally UNHAPPY kid ("I'm TIRED of spaghetti, I don't even like it any more!").

So there you go.

I need to re-read Audrey Thomas' book "What's for dinner" She's got great ideas. I just need to tailor it to our family.

Any ideas?

Corn in my lint-trap

Yes it is true, there is corn in my lint trap. How? you may ask? Well let me tell you -- it is not pretty.

It all starts with dinner. I decided to go with a "kid friendly" dinner last night. Lucas mentions at the table that his stomach doesn't feel so well - and coming from him, I have to believe him, yet i try to ignore it at the same time. He eats a chicken nugget, some mac and cheese and some frozen corn. not much, but enough to satisfy the dinner police.

Scott and I went out for the evening and returned around 10pm. Lucas was up telling me he had a stinky bottom (and it hurt). Well needless to say, he had been in the bathroom quite a bit while we were gone, and it wasn't looking good. We plopped him into the tub for a bit, got his PJs back on and got him back in bed.

About 30 minutes later, he comes back down and tells me he threw up. Lucas has never been one to make it to the bathroom when he's throwing up, or even a bucket if it was near (in this case it wasn't). He tried to tell me he didn't throw up in bed, but on the floor - this is only semi-accurate. yes it was on the floor, but it was also everywhere else.

Scott and I went to work in cleaning up the carpet (and the wall!?) and i grabbed the sheets from the bed - and got them in the wash right away.

This morning i put the sheets into the dryer and afterward when I cleaned the lint trap for the next load and what did i find? Corn. Now this corn was not whole kernel corn. At least not any more, mostly just the hulls of the kernel. After going through the dryer, they were actually crispy. Yum.

So, that is how I got corn in my lint trap.

Is this the year?

I long to have my body back to the point it was between my two sets of kids. I had lost 20 pounds, plus i worked out and I'd have to say I looked pretty good! I know that was almost 10 years ago, now, and my body most likely not get there, but I still want it. Now we're looking at at LEAST 40 pounds.

The past few years I think, "Oh this summer I'll finally be thin", only to have the months fade away, and I'm still not where I want to be. my baby will be 7 in May, so its hard to blame it on that!

The hard part is that I love to eat. I can exercise pretty consistently, but i just sabotage it with my food. It's like my body knows that there is going to be some sort of change soon, and I go into food mode and eat more, even stuff i wouldn't normally eat.

I have given up soda for now, but even once in a while i "fall off the wagon" on that. Plus, i think that i am substituting with other foods. Anyway, why is it such a battle?

I was ready to sign up for this class at Anytime Fitness that met 2x a week with weight and fat% check-ins for the next 3 months. Normally I wouldn't consider spending the $$, but I decided this would be a good birthday present and worked out the details. now they've changed the class to 1x a week, and I'm concerned that it wont be enough - ugh. I hate it when you've got something all worked out and then the rug gets pulled out. I totally know that God works everything out for good, so i understand that this is one of those occasions that I'll just have to trust him.

If only i could REALLY trust him with my food in-take, then maybe this really will be the year.

I'm a native Minnesotan, so the weather in general doesn't get me "riled up". But, I am tired of the COLD this season. Mostly because even though we live within two blocks of the school, I am forced to make a decision whether or not I need to drive my kids to school. I RARELY got a ride to school growing up (and, no, I didn't walk up hill, both ways, barefoot). Even my older two boys rarely got rides to school. But for some reason this year, the younger two boys have "lucked out" and gotten rides almost everyday this new year. There are also 200 other parents doing the same thing for their kids so traffic is always fun dropping off at the school. I have held my ground, though, and have made walk home most everyday.

Can't wait until the warm up.

I decided not to do Tuesday Morning Bible Study this Winter/Spring. Where it has been something that is just a given, I feel like its not something I HAVE to do. So, this morning, instead, I volunteered at the school library. I have been doing that most Friday afternoons - helping shelve books, check in and out books for students. Today was fun, because it was very busy. I learned a lot and i LOVED it. Who knew that being a LIBRARIAN could be fun??????

Discontent

I find it interesting that once you get a feeling of discontentment with a job, problems and issues seems to multiply. I am an independent contractor for a major bookseller, serving as a customer service agent out of my home. For the most part I've really enjoyed it, been doing it for a little over a year. But alas, it gets old, and i feel limited on what i can do. Why does it seem to compound, and in such a short time? I can't wait to be done, and I dread working. But I know i need to be patient and wait until the next opportunity.

Then there is an element of excitement for something new, along with the fear of something new.

Its hard to know what's the right thing for me. I know God has it in His hands and need to trust in His wisdom.

*Sigh*

Pizza - its Friday night - great pizza night- Eli's not here, so we aren't limited to just cheese pizza. Yay! So, i sit here - scouring my coupons for the best deal on a great pizza. It's already 6pm - so its going to be late by the time i actually decide. Scott's not home yet, so i guess i have time. TGIF!

i'm going to try quick blog posts.