Is this the year?

I long to have my body back to the point it was between my two sets of kids. I had lost 20 pounds, plus i worked out and I'd have to say I looked pretty good! I know that was almost 10 years ago, now, and my body most likely not get there, but I still want it. Now we're looking at at LEAST 40 pounds.

The past few years I think, "Oh this summer I'll finally be thin", only to have the months fade away, and I'm still not where I want to be. my baby will be 7 in May, so its hard to blame it on that!

The hard part is that I love to eat. I can exercise pretty consistently, but i just sabotage it with my food. It's like my body knows that there is going to be some sort of change soon, and I go into food mode and eat more, even stuff i wouldn't normally eat.

I have given up soda for now, but even once in a while i "fall off the wagon" on that. Plus, i think that i am substituting with other foods. Anyway, why is it such a battle?

I was ready to sign up for this class at Anytime Fitness that met 2x a week with weight and fat% check-ins for the next 3 months. Normally I wouldn't consider spending the $$, but I decided this would be a good birthday present and worked out the details. now they've changed the class to 1x a week, and I'm concerned that it wont be enough - ugh. I hate it when you've got something all worked out and then the rug gets pulled out. I totally know that God works everything out for good, so i understand that this is one of those occasions that I'll just have to trust him.

If only i could REALLY trust him with my food in-take, then maybe this really will be the year.